Toned, Symmetrical People Gettin' It On

I'm all full of sex news tonight.

Did you hear about the condom shortage at the Vancouver Winter Olympics?

Yep. Loads of hot, athletic, young people getting it on.

I'll let you sit with that for a moment.

Now, onto the bits of the story that I find interesting...

Health officials in Vancouver have already provided 100,000 free condoms to the roughly 7,000 athletes and officials at the Games. That's about 14 condoms per person. But as of Wednesday, those supplies started running dangerously low.

Let's think about that for a moment... Assuming that hot people want to have sex with other hot people and not us mere mortals (and admit it, as much as you might fantasize about it, do you really think you could keep up with a world-class athlete in the best condition of their lives? That's okay, I already hear your response... "No, but I would try! Please let me just try!") this means that there are 28 condoms per couple. The games started on 12 Feb and the article was written on 24 Feb. Figure that your event takes place over two days, on average, and that you opt not to have sex on the preceding nights. That's 2.8 instances of sexual activity requiring condom use per day.

Hot, sweaty, athletic adrenaline sex.

Go find your partner, I'll be here when you get back.

I've heard a few people saying different things. My favorite so far has been the call to not send more condoms to the Olympic Village. The reasoning has a delicious form of logic.

"Think of the 2030 games! Breeding the uber athlete! It could be done!"

I have to admit, it sounds just whacky enough to work.

My pet theory is that with all the anti-weed hoo-hah (anyone that's done pot will tell you that it's not a performance-enhancing drug) that they've had to find something else to do with their time off.